Honest, It Does Snow

A Whirlwind

Lately my mind has been swimming with old memories, I am not sure what started all of this. Of course you never have good memories swirling in your head. It is always the bad memories, the memories you wish you could bury away in a deep dark place and never think of again. The kind of memory that shapes the way you react and behave now. A nightmare if you will.

As I am getting older, I am realizing, these memories that haunt my thoughts at night while I am lying in bed, have shaped my attitude towards life and my trust for other people. I am the kind of person, now, that if I see you I will know instantly if you are treacherous or not. If I will like you or not. It is very weird it is almost like a distrust was enabled in me that can smell a "bad person" a mile away. Perhaps I was very naive as a youth and that is why things panned out for me the way they did. I trusted everyone and everything, thanks to that "learned mistake" I will never be the same again.

I was robbed of my youth, my innocence. It was something that was gone in an instance and leaves the kind of hole in you, from which it is impossible to recover. 

I guess it is one of those things that you yourself have to go through to really understand.

Mrs. Meany Pants

Yep that's  me, today is my day. I am in the shittiest mood. I hate everyone and everything. I am in "one of those moods," I suppose I woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. So sue me.

Sometimes in life when you are in "one of those moods" it is really just your true feelings emerging. You may regret what you said the next day, but the damage is done. You have already turned in to super-bitch and rubbed your shitty vibe all over everyone you've talked to. It is good to have days like these from time to time. I think after noon I will be okay and back to my normal happy self. But for now I am contemplating taking a half day and saying screw everyone.

Things I "love" to do:

1. Fight with laundry basket while trying to heave it out of the closet.


2. Fry Pork Chops, only to realize after they were cooked and on the table that they had gone bad.


3. Throwing away Pork Chops that I just took the time to make.


4. Eating "side items" for dinner.


5. Standing outside in the middle of the night with 110mph wind gusts so my little princesses can go pee.

And I Died Of Embarrassment...

The past couple of days a lady that I work with, happens to also live at the end of my street and I have been giving her a ride to work. 

Yesterday we cracked up laughing the whole way there and back. This morning we started cracking up laughing again and talking about my Sugarland CD that is playing etc. I asked her if she heard the song Stay. She said, "no is it on there?"  I said, "yeah do want to hear it."  She said "sure, turn it up." So we listened to that song and the next song came on.  

I just couldn't control my urge to sing.

I love singing and my brain is programmed that driving in the car equals singing.

 So she yells, "You go girl, you can really sing."  I started dying laughing. She said "No, I am serious, you can really sing" I said "Well, thank you" (All the while I am dying laughing.) So then she makes song requests so that I will sing more Sugarland. She was cracking me up.

We get to work and she announces to everyone that "Heather can really sing." I am thinking be quite stop telling people! Now everyone wants me to sing for them! No absolutely not! I refuse to sing infront of people I have to look at everyday.  I was about to die from embarassment. I guess I don't take compliments very well.

Everyone also thinks I should try out for American Idol. My response to that is they don't accept fat girls.

Meme

Thanks, girlymama.  

1. Do you like the looks and content of your blog?

For the most part, I sometimes wish that I could "let loose" about my true feelings on things. I am not sure that I am ready to put it all out there yet.

2. Does your family know about your blog?

My family knows that I have a blog but as far as I know they do not have the address to go and read it.

3. Can you tell your friends about your blog?

Yes, I wouldn't think we were friends if I couldn't.

4. Do you just read the blogs of those who comment on your blog?

No, I look at other blogs but I can never get really attached to many other blogs just yet.

5. Did your blog positively affect your mind?

It is not an epiphany,  it is a online journal like device. I would have to say no.

6. What does the number of visitors to your blog mean?

I could care less.

7. Do you imagine what other bloggers look like?

Occasionally

8. Do you think blogging has any real benefit?

Some blogs maybe, probably not mine.

9. Do you think that the blogosphere is a stand alone community separated from the real world?

Some people treat it that way, but I would have to say no.

10. Do some political blogs scare you? Do you avoid them?

No, but they do annoy me at times because people are such idiots.

11. Do you think criticizing your blog is useful?

No.

12. Have you ever thought what would happen to your blog in case you died?

Not until now, I guess it would just sit here.

13. Which blogger has had the greatest impression on you?

I would say fancythis, she has me hooked.

 14. Which blogger do you think is the most similar to you?

fancythis, I mean we have been friends since we were in Nursery.

15. Name a song you want to listen to.

Sugarland-Stay

Part Duo

So I broke down and called the dentist yesterday due to tooth continuing to throb. They said to just come on in. I leave work and head on over there. As I am driving there I get a SPEEDING TICKET!!! I can't help but think: Mother F***** my mouth is hurting and now I am getting a f****** ticket. I  just want to run this a******  over!

But I digress.

So I finally get to the dentist and she looks at my tooth and takes an X-ray and says that now I need A ROOT CANAL! Are you f******  kidding me? The tooth that you just worked on and put a crown on, now needs a root canal! This is just f****** great!

Apparently when she worked on my tooth, she killed it and it is now dead. In total this stupid tooth has cost me $550.00. That I do not have. A root canal is $198.00 which is better than I expected I guess I should be thankful for that. So I am having that done on Monday. Lucky me!

I think someone put a curse on me!

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!

Oh the pain!!!!!!!!!My tooth is excruciating!

I went to the Dentist last Wednesday and had a crown put on my tooth. My tooth, mind you, did not hurt at all before I went to the dentist but now that she did this to me I have had horrible pain!

I am going today at three so she can "look" at it. There is nothing to see I assure you! It looks like a tooth that for some reason is hurting. If you want my expert opinion she has damaged my nerve and/or gave my tooth an infection of some sort.

Can you imagine I paid $350.00 for this!

I'll be sure to let you know what she has to say.

Update: I decided against going to see satan the dentist. I think if she takes my temporary crown off and pokes at my tooth nub my body will shoot out of the chair and through her ceiling!

If it still hurts by next week then I'll go. For now I will just suffer through!

It Is Time For You To Fess Up!

 Listen up readers, If you are reading this blog. You need to comment. There is no exceptions! Thanks to L she has enlightened me to de-lurking week. If you are lurking, I would love to know who you are!

Celebrity Sighting

While traveling back home from Missouri I spotted a "Celebrity." We stopped at a rest area in Somerset Pennsylvania I went into the bathroom and someone was running in behind me. I finished and came out to wash my hands and the crazy running woman is washing her hands too. I looked in the mirror to see who this person was and it was Julie from the Real World! I was so surprised and took a double take and as soon as I was about to say aren't you Julie she took off running and ran all the way back to her car. My mom was like "did you see that crazy woman running?" I said "it was Julie from the Real World!" "She is practically a celebrity!"

So there you have it, "Celebrity's" pee too, who'd have thunk it!

The Marble

While we were in Missouri a week ago, we went to look at a house in the country. It was everything my parents had been looking for (they have been looking for about 27 years). The house is beautiful! My parents went with the realtor and looked inside the house and then we looked at the outside. Before we left the realtor asks if we would like to look through the house one more time. Dad and I said no, so Mom went in by herself. After about fifteen minutes she comes onto the porch with tears in her eyes. My dad was talking with the realtor and didn't notice. I walked toward my mom and she held out her hand. In her hand was one marble. (A yellow cat eye to be exact) I started to cry.  Out of this entire big empty house that has been completly emptied and cleaned, she found a lone marble. It felt like a "sign" from Grandpa as if he was telling my parents to buy this house. We got ourselves together and went to Dexter to visit family and carry out our trip while we were there.

My Grandpa when he was a child was very into playing marbles. He played them all the time and one time he didn't pick up his marbles so his mother put them in the oven and melted them down. He talked about marbles all the time so this will always be in my mind and remind me of him when I think of a marble.

Last week my mom called the realtor and is in the process of putting a bid on the house. I don't know why but this house is stuck in all of our minds. How can we deny the marble?

I'm Back!

Well I am back, after tons of driving and dealing with family, I am exhausted.

My Aunt Carol was getting on my last nerve she had the balls to come to my Grandma's apartment and tell my parents she is coming to live with them in Delaware.

My thoughts-I am sorry what did you just say, where the hell did this come from? 

My mom ignored her the first day she hinted around then the next day (Friday) she came back to the apartment and spent the night there. Me and the parents were in Dexter during the day visiting my dad's family when we came back to St.Louis we saw her car in the parking lot and turned right around and got a hotel room. In the morning my mom went over to Grandma's and Aunt Carol said she wanted to come to DE again. My mom said if you want to come to DE you need to get a job and start saving money and get an apartment, immediately. My Aunt said well I don't want to do that I just want to stay with you. My mom told her well you sure as fuck aren't coming to my house to live for free. That was it for that discussion she went home that Saturday and we haven't seen her since.

You should have seen my Aunt Carol (mom's sister) my Uncle Ray (mom's brother) and Aunt Carol's kids. They were trying to get there grubby hands on everything. It was ridiculous! I wanted to yell, "Grandma isn't dead yet, you know." Aunt Carol and her kids are greedy and selfish, and Uncle Ray is selfish but none of us like Aunt Carol so I think my Uncle was trying to stake claim on things so she didn't get them. For Example: Grandma gave me her barbecue grill but Aunt Carol took it home with her on Saturday when no one was paying attention.

It is times like these that I am glad I live in DE and they live in MO!